Lovefest at the Oscars

This past Sunday was Oscar night.  That means for one brief shining moment it was time to forget about the kids bouncing off the walls, time to stop writing, time to drink a glass of wine and kick back.  Better yet, it was time to stop worrying about medications, dosages, food allergies and more.  Simply it was time to relax and enjoy the show!

With most of my recent posts coming with an extra layer of gravitas I think it a welcome, if not overdue, respite to offer my two cents about the 83rd annual Oscar telecast, just seen coast to coast on the ABC television network.

For starters, I began the night by ignoring the small but disturbing mini-mound of vomit my little guy deposited in a corner of the dining room.  Seems he’s not eating much, being on this newest dosage of amphetamine fueled hyper-activate medication, so his stomach is acting a bit jenky.  But, ahhh, that’s for another time when we will discuss using children as human guinea pigs in a trial and error odyssey to find meds that work properly: a journey that might ultimately kill me before it offers relief to the little one.

For now, let’s talk about movie stars.  I began Oscar night by doing what most women do – collapsing on the couch and oohing over the stars as they paraded down the red carpet in their designer duds and borrowed bling.

As pre-show played before my tired eyes, I noticed something impossible to ignore… something remarkable.  For the first time, the Academy Awards seemed to have a subtle undercurrent of a not often found “Hollywood” theme.  Was it me or was this a newer, kinder, gentler, more in-touch program?

Now I’m not talking about fashion or acting, I’m talking about the greatest four letter word ever – LOVE — and not just the love of screaming fans who lined the red carpet to see their favorites, but the far more real LOVE that one would expect to see between husband and wife, mother and child.

What started as a typical super-celeb gown fest morphed into substance before my disbelieving eyes.  First there was the “mominees” package, featuring mothers of Oscar nominees, including James Franco‘s mom Betsy, Mark Wahlberg‘s mom Alma, Jeremy Renner‘s mom Valerie,Matthew Libatique’s (“Black Swan” cinematographer) mom Georgina Libatique-Porter, Mark Ruffalo‘s mom Marie Rose and Darla Anderson’s (“Toy Story 3” producer) mom Annie Latta-Krach.

I nearly cried a few times as I watched with rapt attention as these moms of stars and superstars talked about their children the way I talk about mine.  The segment was relatable, heart-felt, surprising in its depth and intimacy, and ultimately it was eminently entertaining.

This segment was followed by a pre-Oscar interview with Nicole Kidman who pointed out that “this is the first time I’ve been nominated while married to Keith, so this is a first for us.”  Could you just die?

But the best quote of all came from Warren Beatty  (himself an Oscar winner, former mega movie star and brother of Shirley MacLaine) who said of his luminous movie star wife, Annette Benning: “You don’t know the half of it – it’s not only that she is the best actress in the world, you can’t imagine what a mother, and a wife and the whole thing – I’m in awe, so I just try to be acceptable.”   Humble and loving.  Does it get better than that?

If it wasn’t for my totally-in-love-with-me-boyfriend curled up on the couch next to me I might have fallen in love with another man right on the spot.  Thank goodness I know my man feels the same about me, or there might have been trouble!

But this moment offered me a highlight for Oscar night… a world-famous couple who on my TV screen connected with grace, love, bound with purpose.  Wow!

Sure, ardent movie fans and TV watchers will gripe about the banal, boring, horribly hosted (sorry Anne and James) broadcast, but wasn’t it nice to get a glimpse of the substance behind the sizzle during the 83rd Oscar telecast?

For mega stars and the rest of us plain old regular stars it doesn’t get much better than have a loving person there by your side, serving as confident, friend, fan and ultimate cheerleader.  We might not be able to share an Oscar with a movie star, but we can relate to feeling the love of another.

This common ground means each one of us, if we’re lucky, can win the ultimate prize by feeling a deeper connection to our kids, partners, parents, spirit – whomever, or whatever it looks like – love always wins.

My other favorite quote of the night: Sandra Bullock – on answering whether motherhood has made her a better actress said: “I don’t know how much it’s changed me as an actor, but it’s made me a better person.”


(Loving credit to my guy, whose edits add the balance to my thoughts, details to my words and forever is the yin to my yang).

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